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Person turns on the computer without a keyboard plugged in. When she turns on the computer, the computer finds out that there is no keyboard attached and it gives a "Keyboard Error" message. She then asks "Why did it give me a keyboard error? There isn't even a keyboard attached?

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Jul 26, 2010 12:31 AM - Stupidity - by Vince

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One day, there was this lawyer who had just bought a new car, and he was eager to show it off to his colleagues, when all of a sudden an eighteen wheeler came out of nowhere and took of the driver's side door with him standing right there. "NOOO!" he screamed, because he knew that no matter how good a mechanic tried to fix it, it never would be the same. Finally, a cop came by, and the lawyer ran up to him yelling. "MY JAGUAR DOOR WAS JUST RUINED BY SOME FOOLISH DRIVER!!!" he exclaimed. "Your a lawyer aren't you?" asked the policeman. "Yes, I am, but what does this have to do with my car?!?!" the lawyer asked. "HA! Your lawyers are always so materialistic. All you care about is your possessions. I bet you didn't even notice that your left arm is missing did you?" the cop said. The lawyer looked down at his side and exclaimed "MY ROLEX!"

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Aug 20, 2010 12:13 AM - Lawyer Jokes - by rolex

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If men got pregnant... 1. Morning sickness would rank as the nations number one health problem 2. Maternity leave would last for two years with full pay. 3. Children would be kept in the hospital until toilet trained. 4. Natural childbirth would become obsolete. 5. All methods of birth control would become 100% effective. 6. Men would be eager to talk about commitment. 7. There would be a cure for stretch marks. 8. They would serve beer instead of coffee at antenatal classes. 9. Men wouldn't think twins were so cute. 10. Sons would have to come home from dates by 9 pm. Hehehe!

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Oct 6, 2010 05:53 PM - Men Jokes - by Trish

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Dear Kids, There is no Santa. The presents are from your parents. Love, Wikileaks

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Dec 23, 2010 07:46 PM - Kids Jokes - by Santa

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The class assignment in composition was to write about something unusual that happened during the past week. Little Irving got up to read his. "Papa fell in the well last week - " he began. "Good heavens," shrieked Mrs. Kroop, the teacher. "Is he all right now?" "He must be," said little Irving. "He stopped yelling for help yesterday."

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Aug 11, 2010 10:40 PM - Kids Jokes - by Irving

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In the Hospital the relatives gathered in the waiting room, where their family member lay gravely ill. Finally, the doctor came in looking tired and somber. "I'm afraid I am the bearer of bad news," he said as he surveyed the worried faces, "The only hope left for your loved one at this time is a brain transplant. It's an experimental procedure, semi-risky, and you will have to pay for the brain yourselves." The family members sat silent as they absorbed the news. After a length of time, someone asked, "Well, how much does a brain cost?" The Doctor quickly responded, "$5000 for a male brain, and $200 for a female brain." The moment turned awkward. Men in the room tried not to smile, avoiding eye contact with the women, but some actually smirked. A man, unable to control his curiosity, blurted out the question everyone wanted to ask, "Why is the male brain so much more?" The doctor smiled at the childish innocence and then to the entire group said, "It's just standard pricing procedure. We have to mark down the price of the female brains, because they've been used."

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Nov 21, 2010 01:47 PM - Funny Jokes - by Jenny

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This one is really a WIN if she is still alive ;) The look on her face tells another story though!

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Feb 21, 2010 08:41 PM - Fail - by conquer

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Funny Men Put Downs :- What's the best way to force a man to do sit ups? Put the remote control between his toes. Why are all dumb blonde jokes one liners? So men can understand them. Why did God create man before woman? Because you're always supposed to have a rough draft before creating your masterpiece. Why do men need instant replay on TV sports? Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened. Why is psychoanalysis a lot quicker for men than for women? When it's time to go back to his childhood, he's already there What do you call a handcuffed man? Trustworthy. Why do only 10% of men make it to heaven? Because if they all went, it would be Hell. Why do men like smart women? Opposites attract. How do men define a "50/50" relationship? We cook - they eat. We clean - they dirty. We iron - they wrinkle. How is Colonel Sanders like the typical male? All he's concerned with is legs, breasts and thighs. How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? ONE, He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him. What should you give a man who has everything? A woman to show him how to work it. What's a man's idea of honesty in a relationship? Telling you his real name.

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Sep 1, 2010 07:39 PM - Men Jokes - by Liza

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George W. Bush went to see the doctor to get the results of his brain scan. The doctor said: "Mr. President, I have some bad news for you. First, we have discovered that your brain has two sides: the left side and the right side." Bush interrupted, "Well, that's normal, isn't it? I thought everybody had two sides to their brain?" The doctor replied, "That's true, Mr. President. But your brain is very unusual because on the left side there isn't anything right, while on the right side there isn't anything left."

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Aug 11, 2010 10:38 PM - Funny Jokes - by George

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They say children say the darndest things. Well what about dunce students sitting their G.C.S.E (UK) exams (similar to SAT)? These are allegedly answers that were actually given in school exams. Enjoy and choose your favorite. Q: What is artificial insemination? A: When the farmer does it to the bull instead of the cow. Q: Name the four seasons. A: Salt, pepper, mustard and vinegar. Q: How is dew formed? A: The sun shines down on the leaves and makes them perspire. Q: What is a planet? A: A body of earth surrounded by sky. Q: In a democratic society, how important are elections? A: Very important. Sex can only happen when a male gets an election. Q: What happens to a boy when he reaches puberty? A: He says goodbye to his boyhood and looks forward to his adultery. Q: Name a major disease associated with cigarettes. A: Premature death. Q: How can you delay milk turning sour? A: Keep it in the cow. Q: What does "varicose" mean? A: Nearby. Q: What is the most common form of birth control? A: Most people prevent contraception by wearing a condominium. Q: Give the meaning of the term "Caesarean Section." A: The caesarean section is a district in Rome. Q: What is a seizure? A: A Roman emperor. Q: What is a terminal illness? A: When you are sick at the airport Q: What does the word "benign" mean? A: Benign is what you will be after you be eight.

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Sep 29, 2010 08:54 AM - Kids Jokes - by Sally P

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