November 11th, 2010
Illusions or Your Mind Playing Tricks?
October 24th, 2010
Tale Of The Optimist & Pessimist Twin Brothers
Optimistic and Pessimistic Twins
A family had twin boys whose only resemblance to each other was their looks. If one felt it was too hot, the other thought it was too cold. If one said the TV was too loud, the other claimed the volume needed to be turned up. Opposite in every way, one was an eternal optimist, the other a doom & gloom pessimist.
Just to see what would happen, on the twins’ birthday their father loaded the pessimist’s room with every imaginable toy and game. The optimist’s room he loaded with horse manure.
That night the father passed by the pessimist’s room and found him sitting amid his new gifts crying bitterly.
“Why are you crying?” the father asked.
“Because my friends will be jealous, I’ll have to read all these instructions before I can do anything with this stuff, I’ll constantly need batteries, and my toys will eventually get broken,” answered the pessimist twin.
Passing the optimist twin’s room, the father found him dancing for joy in the pile of manure.
“What are you so happy about?” he asked.
To which his optimist twin replied, “There’s got to be a pony in here somewhere!”
October 14th, 2010
What is 8 Inches long?
What is 8 Inches long?!
Funny Riddle
I AM
8
INCHES
LONG.
MY FUNCTIONING IS
ENJOYED
BY
MEMBERS
OF
BOTH
SEXES.
I AM
USUALLY FOUND HUNG,
DANGLING
LOOSLEY
READY FOR
INSTANT
ACTION.
I BOAST A CLUMP OF
LITTLE
HAIRY
THINGS
AT
ONE
END
AND
A SMALL
HOLE AT THE OTHER.
IN USE
I AM
INSERTED,
ALMOST
ALWAYS
WILLINGLY, SOMETIMES SLOWLY,
SOMETIMES
QUICKLY,
INTO
A
WARM,
FLESHY, MOIST OPENING WHERE
I AM
THRUST
IN
AND
DRAWN
OUT
AGAIN
AND AGAIN MANY TIMES IN
SUCCESSION,
OFTEN
QUICKLY
AND
ACCOMPANIED BY SQUIRMING BODILY MOVEMENTS.
ANYONE
FOUND
LISTENING IN WILL MOST SURELY
RECOGNIZE
THE
RHYTHMIC,
PULSING
SOUND, RESULTING FROM THE
WELL
LUBRICATED
MOVEMENTS.
WHEN
FINALLY WITHDRAWN, IT LEAVES
BEHIND
A
JUICY,
FROTHY,
WHITE
STICKY
SUBSTANCE, SOME OF WHICH WILL
NEED
CLEANING FROM
THE
OUTER
SURFACES OF THE OPENING AND
SOME
FROM
MY
LONG
GLISTENING
SHAFT.
AFTER EVERYTHING IS
DONE
AND
THE
FLOWING
AND
CLEANSING
LIQUIDS HAVE CEASED
EMANATING,
I AM
RETURNED
TO
MY
FREELY
HANGING STATE OF REST,
READY
FOR YET
ANOTHER
BIT
OF
ACTION,
HOPEFULLY REACHING MY
BRISTLING
CLIMAX
TWICE
OR
THREE
TIMES A
DAY, BUT OFTEN MUCH LESS.
WHAT AM I???????
AS YOU MAY HAVE ALREADY
GUESSED,
THE
ANSWER !
TO
THE
RIDDLE
IS
NONE OTHER THAN YOUR VERY OWN……… .
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TOOTHBRUSH.. …….
what were you thinking?
